Few utilize the power of sexual suggestion as often and unabashedly as car companies.
Think of the adjectives used to describe cars in ads and commercials: sleek, smooth, sexy, powerful, thrust. Not to mention memorable tag lines like the one Toyota used in some of its advertising for the Rav4: “Sometimes size does matter.”
“Our society likes to sexualize anything it can from human bodies to inanimate objects,” goes a recent post from OpenBook Autos, one of Salt Lake City, Utah’s most respected car dealerships. “Think we’re wrong? At some point, you’ve been caught calling a car “sexy.”
It just comes with the territory.
That’s why consumers are served up ads like the commercial for the Mercedes-Benz CLA.
“What’s hot?” Mercedes asked its YouTube audience. The answer was the car, of course. But there’s more. “What’s hotter?” asked the announcer. The answer: “Kate Upton washing it in slow motion.”
It was a Super Bowl ad that went full bore. Ms. Upton, lips pursed, blows a mound of foamy soap bubbles off her outstretched hand. The gleaming Mercedes drips with water (sweat) in the soft sunlight. The football team actually doing the washing can’t look away from Ms. Upton as she saunters forward, tousling her hair suggestively.
“You missed a spot,” she says.
What spot we’re not told, but it might involve the letter G.
The phenomenon doesn’t just apply to new cars, according to OpenBookAutos. Its recent post reviewed three classic cars that retain their sex appeal over time. It’s like appreciating George Clooney and Brad Pitt in an era when the new heart throbs are twenty-somethings Josh Hutcherson (Hunger Games) or Logan Lerman (The Perks of Being a Wallflower).
So which used cars rev the sex appeal engine? Here are the top three, according to OpenBook Autos:
1. Chevrolet Corvette
“These used cars are scarce enough to get anybody’s attention. George Clooney, the definition of sexy, is much like one of these casual, yet speedy sophisticates; they both become more attractive with age. The Corvette employs a liminal and phallic shape, which may have something to do with its erogenous quality.”
2. Cadillac Deville
“This unsung hero of the 20th century is our sultriest selection. Nobody seems to drive one anymore, and this is why owning one would make you stand out among the long list of rolling clichés. The Cadillac Deville is our patron saint of sexiness for used cars everywhere – instilling hope within the oldest makes and models.”
3. Nissan 350Z
“This car is cheap and sexy. Although the same combination of qualities yields different results for humans in the real world, this gem gallantly displays its ability to achieve such a magnificent contradiction with equal simplicity and sophistication, making it one of the most purchased sports cars in history. To illustrate this paradox in a more comedic way, if a human was exactly like this car, he would be an extremely good looking man who insisted taking his date to a McDonalds in a used, run-down car.”