How do you know you’re a good or bad single parent?
Well, first off, being a parent is the hardest job in the world. So even if you’re not perfect, you’re probably still an awesome person. Think about it this way: If you volunteer your time, but show up late, you’re still doing work of a martyr. Does it really matter if your track record isn’t stellar?
But eyes are watching you at every step of the way.
So what are you doing to show your best side? And we’re not just talking about being a good parent to your kids, but a role model for future generations? Date for your love interest? Lover for your mate? Yes, being a single parent dating is a hard job to fill. But being a parent on your own means you’re already filling many hats without even thinking about it.
So give yourself a pat on the shoulder. You’re already awesome!
Ways to measure good parent/bad parent. Do us all a favor.
If you have to ask if you’re doing a good job as parent, chances are, you’re probably a good parent. If you think you’re fricken’ fantastic just for being you, chances are you’re the only one who thinks you’re doing a good job.
As parent. As a single. As a person.
Here’s a few questions/answers to ponder if you’re wondering whether or not you’re on the right track as a single parent dating. If you associate yourself mostly with the “good parent” descriptions, hat’s off! If you fall into mostly the “bad parent” descriptions, it’s time for a time-out to do some introspection. After all: what is your ultimate goal: Your own happiness or that of others (especially the ones you love)?
Here’s a list of the seven top “good parent/bad parent” characteristics to look out for, whether it’s in a prospective date or yourself.
1. Promotes kids.
1. Promotes kids rather than self-promotion.
Have you noticed that a single parent prospect mostly talks about him or herself? He or she is probably more into self-promotion than self-awareness (that would include mostly boasting their children’s accomplishments as opposed to their own). Find your love interest guilty of self-promotion? Don’t quit unless you’re OK with giving up your own needs in a relationship as long as your significant other is a “superstar.”
2. Focuses on kids over dating.
2. Focuses on kids rather than dating.
A good parent with focus on being a good parent over being a good date. Be very aware if your dating prospect is all about showing you a good time and you never hear about their kids… until much later. You can date while being a single parent. But know that dates come and go. Your kids are permanent.
3. Focuses on life rather than romance.
3. Focuses on life rather than romance.
Like #2, a good parent will focus on life’s responsibilities rather than romance, whether it’s their children, pursuing their career, going back to college or finding work to sustain life. Love does NOT supersede those events, no matter how much you’re a love addict.
4. Practices safety first.
4. A good parent practices safety first.
A bad parent will forfeit their child’s safety to pursue love, even if it means dropping your kid off with the neighbor who dates multiple people, has a pitbull and is unpredictable while you pursue love. I’ve seen first-hand the ability to pass along your own kin to pursue love. And let me tell you: These people are below pond scum. Enough said.
5. Seeks healthy love.
5. Healthy single parents seek healthy love.
And with that said, nothing less will do. Unhealthy single parents are just looking for love. Any dysfunctional relationship will do. Don’t forget that your kids will follow in your footsteps of what “normal” is for you. So you best choose healthy love connections if you want your kids to follow in your path.
6. Healthy body.
6. Healthy body = healthy self-love
Don’t be fooled by the songs that say you’re perfect just the way you are. If your BMI is well above what’s normal for your height, weight ratio, stop posing those standards on your kids. Yes, maybe someone will love the way you look, but it doesn’t mean you’re showing positive role models for your child. Be healthy; heart, body and mind.
7. Not desparate.
7. Not desparate to find love.
They say love happens when you least expect it. At least, you should not be DESPARATE to find it. So with that said, take it easy and enjoy the cosmos. If love happens, embrace it. If not, enjoy time spent with your kids. You know that in the end: Time spent with loved ones is always worth it, whether it’s romantic or parental. Enjoy the cosmos.