Mark Holder is a producer for films like She Wants Me, The Demented and The Outsider. In the My Life as a Dad series of interviews, celebrity dads talk about life as a dad and things they deal with in raising their children. In this installment, Mark talks about the passing of his family members and friends and how he talks about that with his children. In part of the interview, Mark talks about the passing of his father in law and conveying the news to his young son. As parents we all will have to face the inevitable topic of death and simultaneously comforting our children and dealing with our own grief.
The 5 minute interview goes further into Holder’s life and these events.
“So at that time, he was 3 or 4 years old and it was very simple . . . Jackie went to heaven. That’s the one time we all used a religious reference. He understood that. For him it wasn’t a bad thing.”
Today’s modern dad is more apt to have grown up in a household where dads didn’t express affection or open emotions. Yet today’s dads now are more open to freely express themselves to their kids. As single mothers we should encourage and promote that behavior with the fathers of our children. Helping a child understand the death of a loved one, a family member, a friend or a pet is an essential part to coming together as a family and building that support network. School counseling expert Bonnie Rubenstein, EdD, associate professor at the University of Rochester’s Warner School of Education writes about something called a grief burst.
A grief burst is a normal experience after losing a loved one—may be triggered by the sight or sound of the holidays in a retail store, the smell of something at home or in school, the taste of a dish once prepared by a loved one, or by a memory.
Dallas Single Mom Examiner has experienced a grief burst. While in high school my grandfather died and the family went through the routines associated with death such as the wake, funeral and gathering of families. While I was not an adolescent anymore it wasn’t until a year or so later in college that I had a grief burst in the middle of class. The topic in class about flag burning and freedom of speech. It wasn’t the topic that made me cry in the middle of my history class it was just seeing the flag. The images of the flag being draped over my grandfather’s casket was the trigger that put me in a crying fit or as Dr. Rubenstein calls the grief burst. I think Holder’s interview epitomizes what all parents go through – moms and dads when dealing with this special kind of life event for kids.
My Life As A Dad (MLAAD) is the first show of its kind to delve into the lives of celebrity and professional athlete dads to get their answers to important questions, such as how they feel about being a dad, their parenting philosophies, how they balance their family life with their professional life and, in some cases, how they relate their unique upbringing to being a dad today. The series features interviews with the likes of actor/comedian Tom Arnold, Dancing with the Stars winner J.R. Martinez, NCIS Los Angeles’ Eric Christian Olsen, Witchblade’s Will Yun Lee, and many more! Subscribe to My Life as a Dad on on YouTube: