The media has been flooded with Ray Rice information (and misinformation) for the past few days. Let’s all take a deep breath and think this out rationally.
Here’s what we know about the Ray Rice incident:
(Editor’s Note: Notice the use of the word ‘incident’ in its singular form. Ray Rice was never reported before in a domestic violence incident before. That does not mean he never did anything. A violent episode like this being a one-time occurrence is about as likely as a fundamentalist Islamic terrorist being elected pope by the College of Cardinals.)
Fact 1: Ray Rice is guilty. It’s all on tape. Ballgame over.
Fact 2: What Ray Rice committed was not “domestic violence.” Rather, it was assault and battery. Indeed a grand jury indicted him on third-degree aggravated assault charges. If convicted, he faces three-to-five. But the Atlantic City cops have offered to drop the charges if he completes a year-long counseling program.
Which is bullshit.
Ray Rice, a strong NFL player, knocked out his slender wife with a vicious left hook square in the jaw. Had it been in the ring, it would have been a great punch. But had it been in the ring, it never would have happened because his opponent would be as big or bigger than Rice.
Fact 3: Ray Rice is a pussy.
The NFL, meanwhile, says it’s shocked by this whole incident. Roger Goodell claims that when he saw the footage the same time the rest of the world did (compliments of TMZ, but that’s another matter entirely), it was the first time he saw it. His hands are clean.
Fact 4: Roger Goodell is full of shit. You’re trying to tell me that a league that investigates and polices its players to the degree that it knows whenever a third string rookie offensive guard smokes a joint doesn’t know that a star running back has been indicted and faces a felony assault rap?
Here’s what we don’t know:
How did TMZ get the footage in the first place?
Who saw the tape before it was released?
Why didn’t Rice receive a lifetime ban rather than an “indefinite suspension”? (Realistically, he will never see foot on an NFL gridiron again. But hey there’s always the Canadian Football League, right? If not, some Arena Football League team would try and fill some seats with him, I’m sure. But that would turn Rice into a circus clown. He’s much more deviant than that. Besides, he’d never start a fight there. Those guys are WAY too big. (Just make sure he doesn’t try breaking the gender line and getting a job in the Legends Football League—formerly known as the Lingerie Football League—although even the LFL looks WAY too rough for Ray-Ray: Panty League Brawl!)
No, you can pretty much take it to the bank that Ray Rice’s football career is finished. But here’s something else to ponder:
Fact 5: Throwing the book at Ray Rice does absolutely nothing to correct the issue of domestic violence. Nothing at all. Nada thing. But many people will likely say, “Whew! We got Ray Rice off the streets. Now everything in right with the world.”
Everything is not right with the world. I’d go so far as to say everything is, well… broken. For those of you who don’t think Bob Dylan is a prophet, listen to this light ditty released in 1989: Everything Is Broken.
Ray Rice is small by NFL standards. Almost tiny. At 5-8 and 206 pounds, Rice is fortunate he won’t be returning to the NFL anytime in the foreseeable future. If he did, you can bet the farm that there would be dozens 300-something-lb. linemen salivating at the chance to squash him like a bug on the windshield of a car going 70 mph on the highway.